


Love Like A Thief

by roe87



Category: Captain America (Comics), Captain America (Movies), Captain America - All Media Types
Genre: Captain America Steve Rogers/Modern Bucky Barnes, First Meetings, Fluff and Humor, M/M, Meet-Cute, Nomad Steve Rogers, Sassy Bucky Barnes, Shrunkyclunks, Thief Bucky, Vigilantes and rooftops, meet awkward
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-17
Updated: 2017-12-17
Packaged: 2019-02-15 17:16:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,150
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13035777
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/roe87/pseuds/roe87
Summary: Bucky Barnes is just an honest thief, trying to make a living.Then he meets a hot blond in spandex and a cape, who keeps getting in his way.





	Love Like A Thief

 

 

 

 

"The robb'd that smiles, steals something from the thief."

\- Othello, Shakespeare.

 

 

 

Bucky climbed up the old fire escape in the dark, feeling pretty pleased with himself.

His bag of loot slung over his shoulder, and he was home free without tripping any alarms. He got to the roof and took one last look around for any activity down on the street, but all was quiet.

Bucky grinned to himself and took off at a run. He jumped the gap between buildings and crossed two whole blocks before something whistled and he froze, alert.

All was still quiet, and he was about to write the sound off as nothing, when a heavy figure dropped down ahead of him, dark cape billowing behind him.

Oh fuck, Bucky thought, sensing competition for his haul.

Then the guy stood up to full height and Bucky's jaw dropped.

Oh, _fuuuck_ , he thought, as he laid eyes on possibly the most impressive specimen of a man he'd ever seen. Tall, broad, blond, sculpted to fuck, and dressed in tight blue spandex, with a full chest-to-navel split in the front of his suit like he wanted people to ogle his perfect pecs.

Pecs that flexed as Bucky stared at them.

An involuntary noise escaped Bucky's open mouth, and before he could tear his eyes away or react, the newcomer grabbed onto Bucky's bag as he knocked him down.

Bucky yelped in surprise. The bag tore, money and jewels spilling out on the roof. He tried to right himself but when he turned to aim a fist at the guy, Bucky's eyes got stuck on his bulging pecs, out on display thanks to the costume's titty window.

The split second delay was all the other guy had needed, and he’d knocked Bucky down.

And what a punch.

That had to be superhuman strength right there. Bucky was dazed, his vision blurring. The rough concrete of the roof met his back hard, and Bucky groaned when the guy heaved him up again.

He handcuffed Bucky to the railing of a small water tower.

"Goddamn it," Bucky grumbled, trying to blink the dizziness away.

He looked up to see the costumed beefcake gather up Bucky's stolen goods.

"Hey, those are mine," Bucky told him, although he was distracted by the blond's costume again. It was skintight, dark blue and yellow, with a half mask over his face, not unlike Bucky's own domino mask.

"So, what do they call you, pal?" Bucky taunted. "The sucker puncher?"

The blond looked over, corner of his mouth quirking in a smile. "Hardly a sucker punch," he replied, voice deep and smooth. "Besides, you stole these."

"My point exactly!" Bucky twisted in his cuffs, watching as the masked menace gathered up Bucky's hard-won loot and made to leave. "Hey! It was a sucker punch because I was distracted by your enormous tits in my face! Who goes around distracting guys like that? It's fucking unfair."

Bucky huffed in frustration. He totally wasn't expecting the blond to pause, turn around and walk back over to him.

"Yeah?" He grinned, and he looked far too young and wholesome when he smiled like that to be leaping about rooftops at night...

...and dressed in tight spandex. 

Bucky gulped, nodded, and tried not to let his eyes wander over the guy's ripped bod.

It was a losing battle.

Then the sonnuva bitch actually flexed his pecs, making his titties bounce a couple times before he laughed in Bucky's face and turned away.

"The cops will be by to pick you up," he called over his shoulder.

Then he jumped off the side of the roof and disappeared.

Bucky realised his mouth was hanging open again, and he closed it sharply.

"Fuck," he muttered, and then looked up as he heard sirens in the distance.

"Double fuck," he said, then began to twist himself free of the handcuffs.

He used the strength of his metal arm to break free, and stood up.

That spandex-clad beefcake was nowhere in sight, and Bucky didn't want to hang around for the cops. So he took off in the other direction, and called it a night.

 

~ ~ ~

 

Two weeks later, it happened again. Bucky had planned out this job meticulously, down to the very last detail. He only ever hit chain stores, places that had insurance up to the eyeballs so they could afford to take a hit.

And he really needed the money, especially after his last job was a total bust.

The burglary had gone seamlessly, Bucky had grabbed cash and easy-to-sell items, stuffed them in his cheap backpack, and climbed his way up to the roof.

Which was his first mistake of the night, but he honestly hadn't expected the same vigilante jerk in a cape to show up. He dropped down out of the night sky like freaking Batman, startling Bucky and almost giving him a heart attack in the process.

Blond-spandex-dude just smiled, smug, and folded his arms across his half-bare chest, pecs and biceps bulging everywhere.

Bucky didn't know where to look.

"Guh," he grunted, and was seriously concerned he might pop a boner, and then how'd he be able to fight this muscle-bound Adonis?

Bucky was not giving up his loot this time.

"You again," he managed, bracing himself. "Find your own patch, pal."

"It's Nomad," the blond said, arching a brow. "And this whole city is my patch, _pal_."

Oh, he was sassy. Bucky liked that.

Shame he'd have to kick his ass.

"Yeah, whatever." Bucky leapt forward, feinted right, then cut in left with a punch from his metal arm, hitting Mr High-and-Mighty square in the solar plexus.

The guy staggered back, shock showing on his face. Bucky didn't give him time to recover, and gave him a hard one-two kick.

Blondie's reflexes were fast, and he managed to block most of Bucky's attack. Then he swung in with a hit that Bucky barely dodged in time.

His training clicked into place, like a key smoothly turning in his brain, and Bucky attacked again.

Nomad blocked him and gave as good as he got, cape swirling around them as they fought in circles, neither one backing down.

Bucky whipped out his favourite Gerber knife and tried to stab the guy, because he was in full attack mode and he couldn't stop himself.

Any lesser man would've been stabbed and bleeding out by now, but Nomad just kept blocking and countering Bucky's moves, lightning fast.

He got a hold of Bucky's left wrist and tried to squeeze to make him drop the knife. Bucky growled and aimed a knee at the guy's gut.

He huffed in surprise from Bucky's knee, and backed Bucky into the wall, pressing on him and still trying to twist his knife free.

Bucky's red haze faltered when he glanced down and realised this guy's tits were pressed right up against him, their bodies close, and he slowly came back to awareness.

They were basically grinding against each other, and Bucky felt the fight ebb out of him as a much more powerful desire took over.

"Hey," he gritted out, "if you wanted to grind, all you had to do was ask."

He released his grip on the knife, let it clatter to the ground.

"I'm not grinding," Nomad replied, frowning at him.

He had very blue eyes, Bucky noticed.

"No? Sure feels like it, pal." He pushed his hips forward, let Nomad feel his hardening cock. And yep, he was hard too. "Spandex doesn't let you get away with much, does it," Bucky teased, circling his hips so their hard cocks rubbed together.

Nomad wet his lips, eyes fixed on Bucky's mouth. "I... I guess not."

He inched closer, hesitating like he thought Bucky might attack him again, so Bucky tilted his face and captured his lips, full and plump, in his and kissed him. The soft scratch of stubble on his jaw rubbed Bucky's skin, made him shiver.

It was a tentative kiss, each of them wary the other may turn. Bucky felt the tension of the fight drain from his muscles, his body relaxing as he leaned into the blond, and pressed his hips forward more insistently.

Nomad made a little noise of surprise, then his hand came up to cup Bucky's jaw and he deepened the kiss, tongue pushing past Bucky's lips.

Bucky let him in, moaned happily as they made out, hot and heavy. He sucked on the other man's tongue, kissed him hard.

He was all ready to come in his pants, when the sound of metal clicking into place snapped him out of his lust driven haze.

"Wha--"

"Sorry." Nomad stepped back, and Bucky realised he was handcuffed to the wall at his back, some old hooks on the brickwork holding him prisoner.

Bucky's mouth dropped open in shock, and he stared at the blond accusingly.

"You asshole. You complete and utter _asshole_."

Nomad shrugged, then went over to where Bucky's bag of stolen items had fallen during their fight. He picked it up.

Bucky was incensed.

"Hey, no! No, you don't get to do that, Blondie. Gimme back my stuff!"

"It's not yours," Nomad said calmly. "You can't go around stealing what doesn't belong to you."

"Hey, screw you, pal!" Bucky pulled on the handcuffs restraining him. "I can't get a job, okay? I'm a vet, I'm unemployable. What do you want from me, huh?"

Nomad looked at him, a small frown between his brows. "Stealing isn't the answer."

"You got a better one?" Bucky demanded. "Or do you just target gay men this way? Distract them with your costume, then leave them to be picked up by cops! What the hell is wrong with you?"

"I'm not... I didn't target you specifically," Nomad said, flustered. "You keep robbing places. And you kissed _me_."

"I thought you wanted to," Bucky sighed, sagging against the wall. "Fine. Go away then. See if I care."

Nomad hesitated.

"Look, I... I'm sorry," he said earnestly. "I didn't mean to lead you on."

"Sure you didn't." Bucky sniffled. "I don't know why I bother. Can't get a job, can't get a date. No one wants to know."

"Hey, don't... don't get upset." Nomad's voice turned gentle, and he got in close to crouch where Bucky had slumped. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to... confuse things. You're cute, it's distracting."

Bucky lifted his head in surprise. "What?"

Nomad smiled at him. "You heard. And I guarantee I don't make out with just anyone, so."

"Yeah?" Bucky started to smile. "That's good to know. It'll make me feel slightly better about doing this..." He swung his legs out and clamped them around Nomad, holding him in a vice-like grip with his thighs while ripping his metal arm free of the cuffs.

"What're you--" Nomad blinked at him, incredulous, and that was all the time Bucky needed to press a button at his belt and point his arm as dozens of small wires shot out from his sleeve and latched onto Nomad's chest. His face twisted up in a grimace as the tasers shocked him, and Bucky quickly rolled free.

"Lipstick taser!" He sing-songed, and grinned down at the convulsing hero. "Later, pal."

He scooped up his bag from the ground and took off at a run.

 

Grunting, Nomad managed to grasp the wires and pull them free, cutting the electric shock.

"Fuck," he huffed, laying on his back and breathing heavily.

_What the hell happened?_

Frowning to himself, he got to his feet and dusted himself down.

"This just got personal."

 

~ ~ ~

 

Steve hadn't felt this incensed in a long time over anyone getting the better of him, and after he got himself home and stripped out of his costume, he had a long cool shower as he plotted ways to get that sneaky thief back.

How many Army vets were there with a state-of-the-art prosthetic arm, a Brooklyn accent, and long dark hair anyway?

So, Steve dried off, changed into sweats, and ordered take-out, and then he did a little digging.

Thanks to the secure search engine on his phone tablet, a gift from Tony, and the firewalls that Natasha had set up, Steve was able to search Army records in secret.

He'd find out who this guy was, and bring him to justice. He had to be getting an Army pension or have some utilities in his name. Steve would track him down.

 

Except, what Steve found didn't make a whole lot of sense.

Searching through records, and taking a guess at the thief's birth year, give or take a couple, Steve narrowed his search down to a few possible candidates, bypassing the DMV security to check their driver's license photos.

He immediately found the guy. Even without the domino mask and the long hair, Steve recognised the handsome face, pale blue eyes, and chiseled jawline.

James B. Barnes.

_Deceased._

Steve frowned at the screen. "Can't be right," he muttered, and went on a search for more information on James Barnes.

More pictures from various sources like his Army enlistment had Steve convinced this was his thief, but all records listed him as dead. His military file was restricted, so Steve had to break past more firewalls before he could see what was so secretive about this guy.

What he read made him both angry and sad.

Hydra.

Illegal human experimentation on prisoners of war, trying to recreate the super soldier serum. James Barnes was listed as missing in action, presumed captured by Hydra five years ago, with no further update.

Steve rubbed his hand over his jaw, scratching at his stubble.

So... if James had escaped and made his way back to the U.S. somehow, he was either laying low, or working for Hydra.

Steve suspected it may be the former. He couldn't really see why Hydra would go to all the trouble of making a super-soldier just to have him steal small amounts of petty cash and a few wristwatches once a month.

It didn't add up.

And he certainly had enhanced strength, Steve could attest to that. Maybe that was how he'd escaped, Steve thought, broke free of Hydra's prison camp but didn't turn himself over to the U.S. Army either.

Steve was convinced the guy was in hiding, and he decided he'd track down Mr. Barnes and pay him a visit.

 

~ ~ ~

 

Bucky trudged home with his multiple bags of take-out, and let himself into his building.

A high metabolism was one thing, but Bucky couldn't afford to feed himself all the calories his body needed daily. He had a whole bag of cookies he was planning to eat right after all the pasta and noodles he'd got.

Passing through the hall, he spotted Mrs Fleischmann headed out, and said hello.

"That looks like quite a feast," she commented, noticing his bags of food.

"Yeah..." Bucky smiled, always polite to his neighbors. "Feed me for a few days."

Which was a lie, but oh well.

They said goodnight, and Bucky headed down the hall to his apartment.

He liked being in the basement because it felt cosy. He unlocked his door and shuffled inside, frowning in confusion at the side lamp, because he could've sworn he hadn’t left it on.

But he did have periods of memory loss, so... Maybe he had.

He shut the door and set his bags down, then he went over to his clothes rail so he could get out of his jacket and hang it up.

"Good evening," a voice said, sounding amused but scaring the shit out of Bucky nonetheless.

He yelped, caught in his jacket and fell into his clothes rail.

Warm, rich laughter filled the room, and Bucky looked up to see it was the blond beefcake, _here_ , in his apartment.

But he wasn't in costume, he was in casual clothes.

Bucky's eyes wandered up and down his body all the same.

"Uh... oh," he said, feeling his face heat. He slowly tried to disentangle himself from the clothes rail. "Look, if you're gonna arrest me or whatever, can you please just let me eat my food first? It'll only take a minute, and I'm starving."

"Super-soldier metabolism?" Blondie asked, hands in his pockets and nodding his head. "Yeah, that can suck. You should try protein shakes."

Bucky pulled a face, and shrugged out of his jacket. "Fuck those, they're disgusting. And I have issues with liquid food."

He side stepped over to his bags of take-out, reaching into one to pull out a carton, never taking his eyes off his intruder.

Blondie smirked at him. "Please don't try to take me down with one of those plastic sporks."

Bucky huffed a laugh. "Erm. I promise it won't be a spork, pal."

"Steve."

"Hm?"

"My name is Steve."

"Oh," Bucky said. "Okay." He shrugged and opened his first container of food, trying desperately to think of a way out of this situation. "You can call me Bucky."

"Is that from your middle name?" Steve asked.

Bucky gave him a warning look, but he wasn't all that surprised this guy apparently knew his full name.

Reminder not to tangle with costumed vigilantes, he thought.

"You wanna sit down?" Steve asked, gesturing to Bucky's beat up old couch.

"Go ahead," Bucky offered, but remained standing close to the door. He started shovelling ravioli into his mouth because that would buy him some time.

Plus he was super hungry.

"So..." Steve sat carefully on the couch, hands rubbing over his knees. "I was gonna ask. Lipstick taser?"

Bucky stopped mid-chew and braced himself. "Hm?"

"What's it mean?" Steve asked, seemingly confused. "It wasn't a lipstick."

"Oh." Bucky swallowed, cleared his throat. "It's, um. From a movie."

His face was flushing hot, because he was an idiot. "It seemed funny at the time."

Steve quirked a smile. "I'm afraid I don't know the reference, but I'm sure it was hilarious."

"Sorry," Bucky offered quietly. "I didn't want to risk getting arrested, and I panicked."

"Well, keep robbing places and that will be a risk," Steve said calmly. "But I may have a solution for you."

Bucky tensed, on alert. "What?"

"A job offer."

Okay, that was unexpected.

Bucky snorted, not buying it. "Turning crooked?"

Steve rolled his eyes, but he was smiling. "Not that kind of job, you jerk. A legitimate job. I need a hand with some things, which requires a person with a certain skill-set. The pay will be worth your while."

Bucky couldn't help a laugh. "Doing what exactly? Help you fight crime across the city? Like Batman and Robin?"

"If you like," Steve said easily. "You'll need to keep wearing your mask. I can pay you five thousand per job, plus expenses."

Bucky almost choked in shock. "What? _How?_ Are you really Batman? What the fuck?"

Steve grinned in delight. "So, is that a yes?"

"Fuck, yeah!"

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> ~ 
> 
> Thank you for reading!
> 
> ~ 
> 
> (Lipstick taser, from Despicable Me movies)
> 
>  
> 
> Got a prompt? Comment here or visit me on [tumblr](http://jro616.tumblr.com) or [twitter](https://twitter.com/jro616).


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